8 Ways to Romance Your Money

Valentine’s Day is my favorite holiday. My mom and dad always made a big deal about getting me fun Valentine’s Day cards and sometimes even a little gift. For me it’s a holiday about all types of love and caring – not solely about romantic love as many see it.

What if this Valentine’s Day you could throw a little love and caring toward your money? Play with this idea a little bit with me, and imagine what it would take to build your relationship with money by romancing it. What might that look like for you? Keep your imagination cap on as I share an interview I had with “Money.”

I asked Money: ‘What it would look like if people romanced you?’ Here’s what I learned:

1. Show Your Money You Care – What would it look like if you to paid more attention to your money? Relationships flounder if one party feels ignored. Showing more care might include:
   • Spend some time with your money. Some people go out of their way to avoid dealing with their money. The thought of it makes them anxious, confused and maybe even ashamed. If “Money” were a person how do you think this would make them feel? Would they want to hang around you if you avoided them?
   • Know what you’ve got. Reviewing at least quarterly what you actually own and owe.
   • Know where it goes. Track your spending to make sure you’re spending money on things you value. Creating a values based spending plan can help. Oh, and budgets don’t really work for most people. Here’s what you should do instead.
2. Don’t be controlling – Money doesn’t like to be used as a weapon or a way to control others.
   • Talk to your partner about money. Money disagreements can be a driver of division for couples. A big dose of honesty can help. If you keep things secret from your honey about spending it’s time to come clean. Understanding your partner’s money upbringing can help as well. Here are some more suggestions……..
   • You’re not better than others just because you have more money. This one may take some personal reflection. I don’t think that most people will admit that they think they are better than others in their life because they have more, but do a check-in on this one. Do you ever silently judge people based upon where they live, their job title, or the car they drive?
   • You’re not better than others because you have less money. This is the other side of the same coin. Do you judge people with a lot of money? Have you made assumptions about their honesty, morals, and priorities just because they have more money?
3. Have some fun with your money!  For some people they are so afraid of not having enough money they hang on too tightly. Clinging is bad for all relationships.  Money likes to have fun with you.  Go on that trip, enjoy that dinner out with friends, buy those tickets to see Hamilton!  Money also likes balance – so remember to enjoy your money responsibly.

4. Let’s grow together – All relationships flourish when each partner grows. How are you helping your money to grow?
   • Money hates being left in a low (or no) interest bearing bank account. Bankrate can give you some ideas to boost the earnings on your cash.
   • Money loves when you save it! Putting your savings on automatic pilot is fabulous. If you have a retirement plan at work you know that having savings taken out of your paycheck every time makes savings easier. Why not show your money some love and boost the amount you’re contributing to your retirement plan. Money promises you won’t be sorry.
   • Money appreciates you reviewing where you’ve invested it. Have your reviewed your portfolio lately? How’s it doing? Is your allocation still in line with your risk tolerance and goals? Not sure? Maybe it’s time to visit with your financial advisor or get one.
5. Don’t take your money for granted – Everyone, including your money, wants to feel appreciated. Saying thank you and focusing on financial gratitude will make you and your money feel good. Here are some easy ways to do this:
   • Write “Thank You” on your checks – In the memo or under your signature write (or type) thank you as a way to acknowledge your gratitude for having money to cover the check.
   • Take 5 minutes each day to note what you are grateful for – This will reduce stress and boost feelings of abundance.
   • Need more ideas? Check out this video on how gratitude can make you rich.
6. Communicate with kindness and caring – Relationships need healthy communication. How are you talking about money? Do you catch yourself saying critical comments (to yourself or out loud) such as: There’s never enough. I’m so stressed dealing with money. I wish I didn’t have to deal with money. Or, instead are you more often saying: I’m so grateful for what money provides. I’m really good with money. It’s important to me to be a good steward with my money. You get the idea. Which do you think Money would like more? This makes a big impact on how often Money will show up for you. It really doesn’t like hanging around people who talk disparagingly about it.

7. Be a good sharer – Money loves when you use it to make things better for not just you, but others too. Nothing would make money happier than you using it as a force for good in the world. What if you decided to give like a billionaire even if you aren’t one? Money’s willing to bet that you’d not only feel great, but maybe even see your prosperity grow.

8. Build a future together – Creating a clear vision of your future gives your money something to work towards. Dream a little. Add yummy details to your vision. Create a Prosperity Picture and you’ll be giving money a goal to help you achieve.

So this Valentine’s Day, and all during the year, consider being more caring, loving and generous in your relationship with money.

I suspect you’ll see money wanting to hang around you more in the process!