Did you know that money stress can actually stand in the way of creating wealth and mess with your health? Here’s an easy way to shift your focus that’ll make you happier and healthier- and maybe even boost your wealth. Give it a try and see what happens.
If you haven’t seen the stats, according to The World Economic Forum Gender Gap Report, at the pace things are changing it will take more than 200 years for gender parity in the world. Seems pretty messed up to me.
Maybe this is why the theme for International Women’s Day 2018 is #PressForProgress.
Economic participation and opportunity is one of the four main areas looked at in this parity assessment. I see this as one of the most important. Studies have shown when women have increased economic empower
ment there are amazing benefits for the economy as a whole, in addition to health care and education.
I’m more hopeful about the economic future of women…
I can’t get my head around it actually taking more than two centuries for economic parity – here’s why I’m more optimistic:
Be the change…
If you want to see a different future for yourself and other women here’s what you can do:
On my first day back in Ghana, as I walked into breakfast at our hotel in the capital of Accra, I was greeted by Mustapha, an amazing young man whom I met on my last trip there. Remember Tigger from Winnie the Pooh? Well, Mustapha’s personality is kind of like that. He’s also brilliant, full of boundless energy, an infectious smile, and the ability to make to make people feel amazing just by being in his presence.
Mustapha and Ellen
He was there to meet our group involved in The Ghana Scholarship Fund and accompany us to Senchi-Ferry, a rural community a couple of hours north of Accra. My husband Steven and our two college-aged kids, Benjy and Amy, joined me on this trip. It had been many years since they had been back to the community.
Driving on the partially paved and pothole-filled roads into the village of Senchi-Ferry for the fifth time, I felt so much more at ease than I did on my first trip here eight years ago. It was more familiar, more comfortable, and filled with anticipation to see friends I had made over the years. I was so excited for our kids to meet the university scholarship students I had met on my last trip. They were the same ages, facing similar issues, even though on the surface their lives seem so different.
Each and every time I’m in Senchi and in Ghana, I grow and learn. Given that the people in this community are of very limited financial resources, you wouldn’t expect that I’d receive money lessons from them – but I did indeed learn a lot about abundance.
What I Learned About Abundance:
Being grateful and appreciative keeps the cycle of abundance going…
Cultural Presentation in Senchi-Ferry
The chiefs in the community wanted to express their gratitude for the Scholarship Fund, and honored us with a series of very special cultural events. There was a large event where all of the chiefs from the surrounding communities came, along with all of our high school and university scholarship beneficiaries and their families, for a program of local music, speeches, and presentations by the students. We also had a special evening with a smaller group of chiefs where they served us refreshments and shared their ritual of pouring “libations.” They gave us an opportunity to ask any questions we had about their customs, tribes, and rituals. They adorned us with special beads as a thank you for the benefits of the education that so many in their community have received (140 kids were sponsored through high school and 33 are currently in university). Although the goal is to be generous without an expectation of anything in return, it feels amazing when sincere gratitude and appreciation is given.
Don’t you feel like you want to continually do more for people who are so gracious in their expression of appreciation? Similarly, when there isn’t gratitude, even though you might not have been expecting a thank you, are you typically eager to keep giving?
Lesson: Be effusive in expressions of gratitude and appreciation.
Abundance comes in many forms…
We have so much more than most people realize. Yes, money is important. We live in a material world. You need money to buy food and shelter. Many of people in the community we visited do not have electricity or running water. They work hard each day to feed their families, and often there isn’t enough. They strive to be able to pay school fees for their children, buy a TV, a refrigerator, a car, and they dream of someday being able to build a home. Clearly there are way too many disadvantaged people in the developed world; too many kids that go to sleep hungry. But for most people in the US, our basic needs are met.
Ellen teaching in Ghana
It’s easy to get caught up in the desire for more or worry about losing what we have. One of the easiest cures for this is to check in on what is truly great in your life. When you focus on what you do have as opposed to what’s lacking, you’ll not only feel happier and more prosperous, but also have new energy to create more financial abundance.
Although many of the people I met on this trip have little in terms of material wealth, they are rich in terms of community, joy, and connection to something greater than themselves. They are accepting of other’s religious beliefs, tribal heritage, and backgrounds.
Lesson: Focus on what you have, not on what you don’t have.
The dirty little secret about generosity…
It feels great. This is why people who value generosity continue to give. Why do I keep going back to Senchi-Ferry? Why do I spend my resources to prepare for the trip and take time away from my business? Because what I receive is so much greater than what I expend in time, energy, and resources. This is what I’ve seen over and over: what you give without expectation of receiving anything in return comes back to you many times over.
Mustapha ( in the cape and mask) and the kids in the Zongo
Mustapha spends his Sunday afternoon with kids in the Zongo helping them to color and do art. The kids run to his step-father’s home to sit on the ground to color and learn from Mustapha. This kind act not only makes him feel good and earns the respect of people in his community, but has also circled back to him, leading to his job offer (even before he graduates from university) to be the CEO in Ghana for World Possible, an organization that helps provide offline learning to children throughout the country.
Lesson: Good flows back to people who do good – but that’s not why they do good.
Of course it’s a good idea to learn about money from books, courses, advisors, and online. This is smart and practical. However, if this is the only way to focus on your money, you’ll be missing the greater meaning and lessons that help you grow and flourish. Getting to know people with different backgrounds and experiences will help you really learn about life – at least it has for me.
Valentine’s Day and talking about financial planning at the same time doesn’t sound very romantic. Yet, having a heart-to-heart about money can help you avoid serious conflicts in your relationship. So how do you find financial bliss with your honey? The more effectively you can communicate and plan for your future finances, the better.
Here are my top 5 dos and don’ts to building an aligned and prosperous financial life:
1. Do talk. There is no one right way to handle money in a relationship. However, you or your partner may think there is! The first step in smart planning is to open the lines of communication. To start the discussion, ask open ended, probing questions. Make sure you share your answers to these questions, too. You’ll gain an understanding of each other’s values about money.
What’s most important to you about money?
If we were working as a team with our money, what would our finances look like five years from now?
If you had the ideal financial situation, what would it look like?
2. Don’t slight your partner. Instead of deciding they’re nuts when it comes to money, learn your partner’s money story. According to cellular biologist Bruce Lipton, we develop most of our subconscious beliefs between conception and age 7. This includes our beliefs about money. We are all brought up with different attitudes and beliefs about money. And, “different” can sometimes mean “wrong” when people fight about money. Here are some questions to get started:
What financial lessons did each of you learn?
Were your parents savers, hoarders, spenders?
Did your parents talk freely about money? Was it a secret?
Did you take care of yourself financially?
3. Do find balance. It’s easy to see your partner’s financial actions as wrong if they aren’t handled in the same way as you would handle them. Many arguments start when one feels the other is spending too much money. Another area of conflict is when one partner feels controlled by the other with respect to spending money. This is not an easy one to tackle. There is no one right way to handle cash. The trick is to find the way that works in your marriage. Discuss and design effective ways to handle cash and spending together. Some couples set up three separate checking accounts: one for household expenses, one for his expenses and one for hers. This way each one has control over his or her own expenses. Some couples need to design a prioritized spending plan. (Here’s how to set up your spending plan: https://www.ellenrogin.com/toss-your-budget-this-works-so-much-better/)
If you are a planner and he’s more spontaneous (or as you say, haphazard) can you find a way to see how this approach can help you to live more in the moment? So think to yourself:
Where am I making my spouse wrong about money?
Is there a way that this could actually balance out my approach?
4. Don’t ignore the money talk. Set up a monthly meeting to talk about family finances. And why not make these meetings fun? How about planning brunch at a favorite restaurant and make these meetings something you look forward to! Planning your future lives together can be one of the most meaningful and important steps you can take as a couple to create a happy financial relationship. Here are some questions to think about when you set financial goals together:
Have you discussed where you want to be financially in 5 years, 10 years and 20 years?
What do you and your partner want for yourselves, your family and your community?
What is the financial impact of these goals? For example, if you desire to travel to China in 5 years, how will you save for this goal?
Have you discussed the funding of your children’s education?
Have you agreed upon a savings and investment strategy?
5. Do be honest. Come clean with all things financial, instead of hiding money secrets. Money secrets will drive a huge wedge in your relationship. It’s like having a financial affair.
https://www.ellenrogin.com/are-you-tangled-in-a-web-of-money-lies/
Do you want important information kept from you?
Do you make purchases and hide them from your partner?
Do you pay cash so he/she won’t know what you spend money on?
Do you have debt or bad investments that you are hiding?
Solid communication about money and effective planning as a couple will help you and your partner share many happy years together.
This past Saturday, I attended the Women’s March here in Chicago. It felt so good to join about 299,999 on a beautiful day, and be inspired by the signs and speeches that my peers shared.
It got me thinking about the power of women. I looked around me, and thought that if all of the women surrounding me, as well as those in the other cities around the world, were to commit to standing in their power of their own personal finances, they could create a massive amount of positive change.
You may be asking now, what does it mean to stand in your power around your personal finances? It means a commitment to managing your financial resources with care, understanding what you really own and owe, committing to investing your assets in alignment with your long-term goals. It’s about moving forward with the women’s movement, and leaving behind any trace of blind acceptance and letting others control your assets. It’s about getting advice and education so you can become savvy and knowledgeable and make sound decisions that affect your future. Lastly, it means being generous with not only your time and talents but also your money, funneling it into causes and issues that you believe in.
Women are expected to control about 2/3 of the private wealth in the next few years. Just imagine the true change that could happen. Instead of aggressive competition, a new era of abundance for many could occur. It is well established that when women do better, children, families, and communities do, too.
If you spend time worrying about your money and your financial future, you’re not alone. According to a Gallup Poll on personal finances, 51% of Americans worry they won’t have enough money for retirement (up from the prior year).
I find that some people experience financial anxiety only when something unexpected comes up, such as a sudden major medical expense. For others, it’s a consistent undercurrent when it comes to dealing with their finances.
No matter the reason for your worry, the truth is that worrying about it isn’t going to lead to a solution. If anything, it can cause more problems, such as increasing your risk of heart attacks, digestive upset, and short-term memory loss. In the book Scarcity, researchers even found that when people are in major financial distress their IQ can actually drop. How can you make a good financial decision if you aren’t thinking clearly?
Instead of worrying, put your energy into effectively reducing your financial anxiety.
Most people worry about their money and never look at what they can do about it. Are you worried about running out of money? Then you need to create 
a spending plan. Get real and honest about what you are spending and what you need going forward. If things are a bit lean right now, cut back. Always remember, cutting back now doesn’t mean cutting back forever.If you’re worried about not having enough money in retirement, then figure out what you actually need. You can start getting an idea of what you need with one of many online retirement calculators, or you might choose to work with an advisor to help you.If it’s some amorphous future financial threat that keeps you up at night, then build your financial cash cushion (or solutions fund as my friend Denise calls it) so you’ll be able to weather a storm.
Your financial situation may be difficult, but chances are you are way better off than most other people. The median income worldwide is just under $10,000. The median per capita income in the 10 wealthiest countries is 50 times that of the poorest nations (all in sub-Saharan Africa).My guess is that right in your own community, there are people who are suffering and could use your help. If you can’t help them financially right now, maybe you can support them by volunteering. Putting your attention on others is a great way to move your happiness level up (and worry level down).When I was miserable in my first job in public accounting, I decided to volunteer as a “friendly visitor” for an elderly woman in Chicago. Each week, I’d visit with Elizabeth and keep her company. Within a few months, I had a new job (which ended up being a new career for me). I believe that volunteering and finding a new job were related. When you take your attention off your problems, solutions find their way to you.
Having a steady stream of financial news blaring at you just might be the source of your money anxiety. The financial news channels don’t make money by telling you “everything will be okay!” You might be suffering from “data asphyxiation.” Too much information can not only increase your anxiety levels, but may also reduce your creativity.
Slowing the chatter in your mind can help you feel calmer. There are all sorts of researched benefits of meditation which include increased concentration, reduced stress, improved health benefits (some studies even show lower medical costs), as well as higher work efficiency. These all sound like smart money moves to me.
A regular gratitude practice has all sorts of yummy benefits. It’s good for your health and your wealth. Even just a short focus on what you are grateful for each day can help reduce your stress levels. If the markets are volatile and you are feeling your mood changing with stock price fluctuations – stop and take “stock” in what you’re thankful for. I’ve been using the Five Minute Journal daily for several months now, and love the easy practice of noting what I’m thankful for at the start of each day.
You might feel like worrying about money is just what you do. It doesn’t have to be. Taking a few steps to reducing financial anxiety will not only help you feel better, but just might help your financial situation.
Do you ever feel like you need to reduce your financial stress? What if I told you that there is a 5-minute secret that could help you?
It might seem impossible, but just five dedicated minutes per day could reduce your financial stress and boost your happiness levels. The secret is: Focus on practicing gratitude. The Thanksgiving season is the perfect time to get started.
The idea behind it is actually really simple. Spend 5 minutes each day to focus on the good in your life. For the past 6 months I’ve been using the “Five Minute Journal” to make this easy. You might choose to dedicate a simple spiral notebook to this task. Or, you could buy a journal, like this one from Amazon . If you’re more of a digital person, you can use the Five Minute Journal app, which you can even add pictures to.
As outlined in the “Five Minute Journal,” start by deliberately focusing on three things:
Putting attention on these things will take your attention off of your financial stress, and redirect your thoughts to what’s working in your life and the steps you can take to make it even better. Keeping this journal will not only prioritize the positive in your life, but you may find that it even helps keep you accountable in working toward your financial goals.
At the end of each day, they also prompt you to go back to your journal, and write down three amazing things that happened throughout the day. You can also include one thing that would have made it even better to give yourself something to strive towards in the upcoming days.
It’s no secret that journaling can be useful in many aspects of your life, and it doesn’t have to be daunting or overwhelming. The “Five Minute Journal” is quick, easy, and can become a habit for you before you know it.
Give journaling a try this week, and let me know how it goes by leaving a comment below or contacting messaging me on Facebook
Have you got some messes standing in the way of your prosperity? Take a look around. Do you see piles of papers and unopened mail? Or maybe all the papers are neatly filed but you have another kind of mess – those things you know you should do when it comes to your finances, but haven’t.
One of he best things you can do to propel you finances is to clear all the clutter.
In this video, I’ll tell you a 3 step system to free yourself from the mess and how it can boost your financial success.
Now that summer is over, it’s time for me to switch from the lighter, entertaining books that I brought with me while traveling this summer, to reading books that feed my mind and soul. Here are some books I’m just loving.
Speaking with Strategic Impact: Four Steps to Extraordinary Presence & Persuasion
By Kate LeVan
You know I do a lot of presentations and speeches and I’m always looking at ways to sharpen the saw with my skills. Well, this isn’t just a typical public speaking book. Kate specializes in coaching people to give presentations that have a big impact. She writes from experience working with corporate executives around the world to create better results from their presentations, pitches, and speeches. Here’s a promise made right in the intro: “This book focuses only on the presentation and communication practices that will help you be consistently extraordinary in the eyes of your audiences, with all the good outcomes that may mean for you.” If you ever give presentations or speeches you’ll want to get this book.
Breaking Money Silence: How to Shatter Money Taboos, Talk More Openly about Finances, and Live a Richer Life
By Kathleen Burns Kingsbury
People can be really goofy when it comes to money. Even goofier when they have to talk about it. Kathleen shines a light on all the problems that can be caused by money silence, and then tells how to break through to a healthier, happier, and well-adjusted place. Whether you argue with your honey about money, find it tricky to talk to your parents or kids about money, or even if you’re a financial professional, you’ll want to learn how to make the money conversations work.
Soul Cyphers: Decoding a Life of Hope and Happiness
By Robert Clancy
Wan
t to build your sense of fulfillment? Learn your true worth? Communicate from the heart? Yah, me too! I know and love Robert. He speaks from soul level. He shares soul messages daily on his Facebook page that are beautiful (and has a community of more than half a million following his inspiring messages). If you go to www.soulcyphers.com, you’ll get a bunch of bonuses after you order his book.
Digital Persuasion: Sell Smarter in the Modern Marketplace
By Erin Gargan
Today’s buyer fields an average of 300 digital messages every single day. I bet you feel like it’s even more than this! In just seconds, people decide whether to open or ignore your outreach online. How can you attract attention, increase influence, and sell smarter in the modern marketplace? This is where Erin Gargan’s sales messaging formula comes in. Her work has been implemented by some of the world’s biggest brands to open more opportunities, ignite profitable relationships, and inspire action from behind the screen.
In this book you’ll learn how to:
Standing out from behind the screen isn’t easy, but with a more persuasive style you can inspire action every time you type, text, or tweet.
Money – You Got This
By Justin Krane
Justin
is just plain funny. He’s a financial life planner and is all about people getting control of their business finances. “Money – You Got This” is a compilation of quick, witty advice on how to look at your business finances and life to make sure you end up with a life you love. Worried he’ll tell you to not buy that latte? He actually tells you to buy it (assuming it helps you feel great and ultimately helps you make more dough). This is a super quick read and perfect for any entrepreneur that thinks they don’t like the financial side of things.
All of our hearts go out to the people in Texas dealing with the hurricane and the unprecedented tropical storm that has followed. Seeing the images on TV of the flooding, the rescues, and the people in shelters has had me thinking about what we all can learn from this.
Gratitude for what’s most important. In everyday life it’s easy to focus on getting ahead, material accumulation, and the minutia and worries of daily life. Sadly, sometimes it takes a huge event to wake us up and bring our attention back to what is most important in life. It can be an illness, death of a loved one, or like Hurricane Harvey, a natural disaster. In the TV interviews I notice over and over that people will mention the loss, fear, and grief they are feeling, but also their gratitude for getting out safely and for the responders and volunteers who have helped. Take a moment right now and think of three things you are most grateful for in your life. A focus on gratitude can move you from fear, sadness, and worry to allow you to be better able to actually help and support.
Prepare for the unexpected. Don’t miss the message that those of us left physically unscathed by this disaster can learn from the people affected. Do you have the proper homeowners and auto insurance in place? Do you have a box you can grab with important documents if you needed to leave your home quickly or do you have this information securely stored on line where you could easily access? Have you built up your solutions fund (aka emergency fund) in case your income stops for a while?
Help where you can. I find it so inspiring seeing ordinary citizens in their boats, kayaks, and Jet Ski’s rescuing people. The stories of neighbors helping neighbors are so heartwarming. Actually watching other’s kind acts can inspire and motivate more good deeds. I typically don’t watch a lot of news as it feels so bad – but this type of news is different. This is when humanity is at its best. If you aren’t helping directly with the flood victims in Texas, where can you lend a hand or do a kind deed?
Open your heart and your wallet. Don’t just feel badly about this disaster; listen to the pull you are feeling to help. Donate what you can. The need is expected to go on for a long time with so many people displaced from their homes. Here’s a link to the American Red Cross Hurricane Harvey disaster relief. It’s predicted that weather events such as this are on this rise. Consider helping organizations that work on the environment such as the Pachamama Alliance, where they stand with the indigenous peoples to protect their Amazonian home and the lungs of our planet in the sacred headwaters of the Amazon in Peru and Ecuador.
Sending love and light to all those affected by Harvey and the aftermath….
